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You are a good swimmer and sometimes take calculated risks.. You see someone who is still trying to swim. They jump into the water and are struggling. Next thing you know they are flapping their arms , going in and out of water, as the waves fling them upwards then dash them downwards again. You know an accident is about to happen. You jump in, trying to help them get back ashore. Then they grip onto you so tight you cant swim. And you cant save them either. Next thing you know you both are struggling for air. You cant get them to let go! Am I about to die now, you ask? who first send me ? When all you wanted to do was help.
In the first case, I needed to rent a new house really quick. My house at the time needed serious renovation works and I had agreed with my landlord it would be best we move out so he can do all the renovation works before the rains started. We didint have the luxury of time so I sent out an advert in my networks for real estate agents to get me something.
A friend and recommended her Sister who was just starting out in real estate business. She had set-up her office ( quiet professional I must say) and was in search of her first gig. That was the first time I was hearing of a female Real estate agent ( In these parts the field is almost fully dominated by men and they have a network that`s hard to break into) . When I met her, she was nice and explained her troubles and how difficult it was for her to work in her domain where the men usually share info about available properties amongst themselves. Landlords to being mostly men dont help the situation.
I decided, I will be her first gig, against the advice of my partner. I gave her my conditions, got her. to visit my home so she sees the type of accomodation I like and the regions I would love to live in. I also told her I was looking to buy a house as well. That is in the long run but she should take both gigs. Get me a place to rent sharp sharp then go find me a place to buy.
2 months down the line , not only had she not shown me One listing that matched my requirements, she barely updated or cared. I had to be calling and chasing her. My landlord was fast losing his patience as the rains had started. If I stick with this woman, I will lose my good relationship with my landlord, probably with my friend too, lose money and still not be able to get a house. The funniest part of it all was when we met to look at the one and only property she showed me , it wasnt in the part of town I wanted to live in, was crap and not inhabitable. Then she said oh ur skin looks smooth. I am selling kernel oil, 1000 a bottle. I am like, you will leave a thousand dollar commission to offer me 2 dollar minyanga? I decided she wasnt serious.
To cut a long story short, I switched back to the guys I usually use. Within 2 weeks I was moving into a new home.
I always try to support friends and family`s business, especially businesses run by women. But often times I have been disappointed at some of their lacklustre attitudes. I still give friends and family benefit of the doubt. Even though I am always on the edge for fear of getting burnt.
Supporting your own may sometimes mean, you jump in the ring and fight some battles with them. It may mean you get to settle for lesser customer satisfaction.It may mean you advance the money to help them manage cash flow issues. And even Make do with some missed appointments. But does it have to be this way? And is it worth the risk?
Will you put your business or needs at risk or lower priority because you are trying to help or support a friend? How can we get the people we want to support to provide us quality service so we dont have to go to their competition?
De Braun Hill 
I supported someone with money meant for my travel and settlement. When I found a house and asked for my money to pay my rent, the dude told me that, “I no sign some cult with you. I no fit move money from my business now give you. I go pay you when my business be in a good position wey I go be comfortable, until then, I no fit touch 1 franc from my business”. It baffles how far people are willing to go because of money. Every dignity, values, principles, relationships, possible future opportunities just seem to fade away when they see money. E pass me.
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The sheer arrogance when they are not in a better position thanks to your help. The destruction of the relationship is almost imminent in situations like this. Especially for people who put money above values like integrity and trust. I hope you got your money back after all that kosh bcos walai domo go commot. lol
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